useless...stupid...

Ah~ I haven't post anything here lately...
Even my posting is not really interesting to read but i think this is what i really can do to keep my memories in my life... so when i grown-up, i can go back to the time where i want to .. haha...
ugh, what am i talking about =____=a

So F.CUZ makes their comeback with "MIDNIGHT SUN"...
But i didn't watch their performance in music bank on Friday. Since i was busy at school ..
There was an event in UNJ(Universitas Negeri Jakarta).. It's japanese festival which i forgot the name, and my "family"(?) went there when i can't.. because my mom didn't allowed me to go.. I felt really upset with myself since i can't help them a lot and i think i'm getting didn't care about them and then i can't go even just for support them....I think i really am useless... and stupid...and can't take any responsibilities for everything....why i keep talking about this nonsense anyway????

I don't know what to do since i'm getting so far away from them.. .i can't be there when they need me,,, will they by my side when i need them?  i don't think so.. i must prepare myself for that time.. the time when i need them the most but maybe they won't be there..
sigh i think that's all what i want to say for now... bye bye~